Sunday, October 29, 2006
Someone come take my mother away from me! Please!
My life is a whirlwind and for the first time ever I feel like I can't control it. I have too much on my plate, too committed to things, my schedule is too damn busy - I am nearly 'booked' for November. Over booked on some days. I need to 'schedule' a night to just sit home with the kids and do nothing. And my kids, my kids need me and I'm not there for them.
I worked so much last week. Henry is missing two library books and we can't find them. Not ONE DAY this past week did he take his homework to school (thanks Grammy & Dad for all your help-not!). He had a nightmare where Lincoln was a mean goblin and put potion in his ear and I was super-mommy-underpants and I was supposed to save him but I didn't. I was at work. :o( How can I keep working when my 7 year old kid tells me that??
I've realized my mother is the biggest FUCKING TATTLETALE EVER! SHUT IT ALREADY! I'LL FIND OUT IN DUE TIME THAT THE BOYS LEFT THE BREAD BAG OPEN!
I'LL FIND THAT APPLE CORE SITTING ON THE TABLE THEY LEFT!
I'LL SEE THOSE BOOKS ON THE FLOOR THEY DIDN'T PUT BACK!
I TOO WILL TRIP OVER THEIR SHOES WHEN I WALK IN THE DOOR!
SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh, and how does she contribute around the house? She buys most the groceries. She used to do the laundry but now, I'm not sure how this happened, but now that I'm working, the laundry is out of control. Piles upstairs, on the couch, on the floor, in the garage!, in the laundry room - like 6 piles in there. Yeah. Lots of dirty laundry. And she was giving me money. Helping me with the bills, paying her 'rent' whatever you want to call it. Last 2 paycheck of hers - I got half of the usual amount or less. Says she has bills to pay (no shit! so do I) and that she as an upcoming dentist appointment she needs to pay for. Then this last paycheck, which I assumed I'd get the normal amount - I get $0.00. She says she never paid that other bill (?!?!?) and that her dentist appointment is tomorrow. WHAT THE FUCK?! This lady is 51 years old (or is she 52) and she is more irresponsible now than ever before in her life.
GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE! LET ME LIFE MY LIFE WITHOUT YOU INTRUDING! LET ME RAISE MY KIDS MY WAY! YOU'VE MADE SUGAR-MONDERS OUT OF THEM! STOP GIVING THEM SHIT YOU KNOW I DON'T WANT THEM TO HAVE! STOP ALLOWING LINCOLN TO WHINE! Hell woman, you whine! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thank God that Celso is there for us. He is taking more responsibility on with the kids than he ever did before. He sees them more now than he did when he lived here. Lidia, his ex, is such a HUGE help to me. She picks Lincoln up from the sitters and Lincoln and her and FINALLY bonded. She teased Lincoln when he was a baby, kinda normal googoo shit people do to little babies - well Lincoln wasn't normal. He was annoyed with it and she thought his reaction as cute or whatever and kept at it. Pestering him and it bugged the crap out of him LOL He tolerated her this entire time but he didn't enjoy spending time with her - it could almost be described as a 'love/hate' relationship. Well now he loves her and they have learned how to play together. He likes her picking him up from the sitter. He likes spending time with her. :) Praise God!
Speaking of God, church has be come a huge source of support for me in so many ways. I do feel uplifted and calm eternally because of my relationship with God. We went to church today as usual and then tonight. Tonight was Pizza & Praise and I loved it. Got goosebumps. Getting goosebumps at church is such an amazing feeling. It is the feeling behind getting the goosebumps is what I'm talking about. I've never ever felt that before. Never enjoyed church and never did I feel a need in my life for the church or God. Something happened last year/beginning of this year, like a new part of me opened up. I feel like the same me, but more now. It is good and I'm so happy with the new church-going, God-knowing me. Thanks and blessings Patty!
and no, I'm not drunk. Haven't had anything to drink. yes, I have been crying so I'm emotional. I hate crying. Sorry I didn't let you call Amy. I just didn't want to start crying again. Please understand. :o) Love you!
My life is a whirlwind and for the first time ever I feel like I can't control it. I have too much on my plate, too committed to things, my schedule is too damn busy - I am nearly 'booked' for November. Over booked on some days. I need to 'schedule' a night to just sit home with the kids and do nothing. And my kids, my kids need me and I'm not there for them.
I worked so much last week. Henry is missing two library books and we can't find them. Not ONE DAY this past week did he take his homework to school (thanks Grammy & Dad for all your help-not!). He had a nightmare where Lincoln was a mean goblin and put potion in his ear and I was super-mommy-underpants and I was supposed to save him but I didn't. I was at work. :o( How can I keep working when my 7 year old kid tells me that??
I've realized my mother is the biggest FUCKING TATTLETALE EVER! SHUT IT ALREADY! I'LL FIND OUT IN DUE TIME THAT THE BOYS LEFT THE BREAD BAG OPEN!
I'LL FIND THAT APPLE CORE SITTING ON THE TABLE THEY LEFT!
I'LL SEE THOSE BOOKS ON THE FLOOR THEY DIDN'T PUT BACK!
I TOO WILL TRIP OVER THEIR SHOES WHEN I WALK IN THE DOOR!
SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh, and how does she contribute around the house? She buys most the groceries. She used to do the laundry but now, I'm not sure how this happened, but now that I'm working, the laundry is out of control. Piles upstairs, on the couch, on the floor, in the garage!, in the laundry room - like 6 piles in there. Yeah. Lots of dirty laundry. And she was giving me money. Helping me with the bills, paying her 'rent' whatever you want to call it. Last 2 paycheck of hers - I got half of the usual amount or less. Says she has bills to pay (no shit! so do I) and that she as an upcoming dentist appointment she needs to pay for. Then this last paycheck, which I assumed I'd get the normal amount - I get $0.00. She says she never paid that other bill (?!?!?) and that her dentist appointment is tomorrow. WHAT THE FUCK?! This lady is 51 years old (or is she 52) and she is more irresponsible now than ever before in her life.
GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE! LET ME LIFE MY LIFE WITHOUT YOU INTRUDING! LET ME RAISE MY KIDS MY WAY! YOU'VE MADE SUGAR-MONDERS OUT OF THEM! STOP GIVING THEM SHIT YOU KNOW I DON'T WANT THEM TO HAVE! STOP ALLOWING LINCOLN TO WHINE! Hell woman, you whine! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thank God that Celso is there for us. He is taking more responsibility on with the kids than he ever did before. He sees them more now than he did when he lived here. Lidia, his ex, is such a HUGE help to me. She picks Lincoln up from the sitters and Lincoln and her and FINALLY bonded. She teased Lincoln when he was a baby, kinda normal googoo shit people do to little babies - well Lincoln wasn't normal. He was annoyed with it and she thought his reaction as cute or whatever and kept at it. Pestering him and it bugged the crap out of him LOL He tolerated her this entire time but he didn't enjoy spending time with her - it could almost be described as a 'love/hate' relationship. Well now he loves her and they have learned how to play together. He likes her picking him up from the sitter. He likes spending time with her. :) Praise God!
Speaking of God, church has be come a huge source of support for me in so many ways. I do feel uplifted and calm eternally because of my relationship with God. We went to church today as usual and then tonight. Tonight was Pizza & Praise and I loved it. Got goosebumps. Getting goosebumps at church is such an amazing feeling. It is the feeling behind getting the goosebumps is what I'm talking about. I've never ever felt that before. Never enjoyed church and never did I feel a need in my life for the church or God. Something happened last year/beginning of this year, like a new part of me opened up. I feel like the same me, but more now. It is good and I'm so happy with the new church-going, God-knowing me. Thanks and blessings Patty!
and no, I'm not drunk. Haven't had anything to drink. yes, I have been crying so I'm emotional. I hate crying. Sorry I didn't let you call Amy. I just didn't want to start crying again. Please understand. :o) Love you!
posted by Kara @ 10:10 PM 
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just please know we are here and would like to and want to help however and where ever and whenever we can... hope that our vacation will take out some stress, not add to it... we love u guys too!!! miss u someting fierce!! u have no idears... lookin thru old pics and well, got all sad, wishin u could see jelly, cus, well, she is my little mandy... u will soon enough!!!! ok, time for me to get to bed... long week ahead of me... halloween in mn, lots of layers...
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# posted by 
: 10:55 PM
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